I've been thinking about why I sometimes respond to others or situations as I do, and I think I've put a finger on one of the issues. Rejection. It is painful for me... and I need to change how I let it affect me.
Here's the Root of It
I was born into a home that was created because of the pregnancy that carried me. I was born a blond, and my hair didn't change to dark brown until I was five. Both my mom and dad, however, were Mediterranean-featured brunettes. Not good. I grew up hearing those first five years from my dad, "You're not my son." In later years it became apparent that I was, but the damage was done.
When I was fourteen my folks divorced. Divorce was a rare thing in those days, and like many kids, I took it hard. It wasn't much later that I left home to avoid being given to the courts as an incorrigible child (they had the papers ready to sign)... another rejection.
Rejection Hurts
When I feel rejection, it brings something up in me that almost takes over. I find myself responding in ways I haven't understood… though now I think I know why.
When we say things-- things that are hurtful-- people are impacted. I am purposing here and now to turn this over to the Lord and ask him to heal me and help me to deal with the pain of rejection when I encounter it. And I'm also asking him to help me not say things to others that could impact them in any way other than positively. My hope: that my words would be as apples of gold in settings of silver (Solomon in Proverbs 25:11)… isn't that a great word picture?
Sunday, March 22, 2009
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3 comments:
Very powerful story, I would never had known without this post.
My prayer is God would continue to heal you of these wounds. It also reminds us all that words hurt and we need to be careful how we use them. Especially at home, but also in the workplace.
Thank you for sharing. Look forward to connecting soon in Birmingham.
Glenn
The best news of all, is, God never rejects us when we turn to him. He is faithful, true, and quick to forgive.
Thank you for sharing this story. Too often, I think we, as a society, hide too much of ourselves. This allows others to know we all have our issues in life and yet we can heal. We can carry on. Thanks again for sharing!
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